As Bishop Mike Rinehart and I dined on buffet style Chinese food, we talked deeply about the many trials and tribulations of the church we serve: the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. In the midst of our discussion on several topics, Mike offered some good words. I might not have this quote exact, but it's close. I know I am capturing the heart of the matter:
Mike said, "When I was a parish pastor, I saw a lot of things in the Synod that I thought were not good, but I was having enough issues in my congregation and staying busy with those. Therefore, I volunteered for a few things in the Synod that I thought I could make a difference with since I didn't have any power to change a lot of things. If I found that I couldn't make a difference, I quit.
Now that I'm a bishop, I see a lot of things in the ELCA that aren't so good, but I've got a lot of issues here in the synod that keep me busy, so I'm volunteering for a few things that I think I can make a difference in..."
It was refreshing to see such a human statement from by bishop. I think he articulated what many of us clergy...and lay folks feel and sense about life. Generally, we look at something, and we have criticisms of it. Whether it is our church, the local grocery store, our favorite football team, our child's little league team, the school system, the federal, state, or local government, etc., etc., etc., we believe if we were in charge, we'd do a better job of it.
But reality does smack us in the face. Oftentimes, we'd like to help. We'd like to get involved. We'd like to make a difference, but...
We have so many irons in the fire in our own places of work or in our families that we have limited amounts of time and energy we can spend making a difference in other things.
This was true in my own life. After being in Cat Spring for over a year and experiencing great growth in my congregation, I was asked to serve on a synod committee regarding evangelism. This particular topic is near and dear to my heart, so I readily agreed. I made several meetings and was enjoying the process, but then life took an interesting twist. We received a call from our adoption agency looking to place a baby, and we just happened to be in that particular market.
Shortly thereafter, we brought our second child home from the hospital, and I knew things were going to get a lot more fun in my home. Growing congregation and growing family meant less hours to drive into Houston and meet with synodical committees and plan functions. I reluctantly surrendered my position on the committee so that I could devote my time to my congregation and my family.
I don't regret the choice, but I do wonder if I could have made a difference. I'm not entirely optimistic.
As Mike articulated and as I have come to see, some organizations and institutions just seem too big. There are too many things to fix. There are too many competing visions and expectations. Time is too limited. Power is too short. There is a reluctance to get involved because it seems like you are spinning your wheels or trying to ram your head through a brick wall. Yet, despite such things, I believe there is something within us that compels us to try. I believe there is something within us that urges us to strive to change things--hopefully for the better.
I'm reminded of a quote from the movie Daredevil, "Can one man make a difference? There are days when I believe, and others when I have lost all faith."
It seems to me that many of us live in this dynamic tension. There are days when we feel like we can conquer the world, and then there are days when we feel like someone is emptying port-a-potties on our heads.
But I think the challenge of living a life of faith is to not lose hope that a difference can be made, no matter how tiny it might be. We don't have to change the scope of an organization or its policies and procedures, but we can allow the Holy Spirit to use us to change others' lives.
This means working with our means. Changing the things we have power to change and leaving all else up to God. Work within your sphere of influence and don't sweat the rest of it. You will save yourself an awful lot of headaches.
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