A Little Sadder Today

It is tough when a church "family" member leaves. 

It's actually easier when they die.  I have a chance to work through my grief by proclaiming the Gospel, shedding a few tears, and remembering that I will see the person again when the fullness of the Kingdom of God is revealed. 

It's harder when a family member leaves because of something that is beyond one's control or because you will not or cannot act in a fashion they desire.  St. Paul was good at being "all things to all people", but I am not. 

I am grieving a little at the loss of one of my associate members.  Like many within the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, he became very upset at the Churchwide Assembly's decision in 2009 to allow congregations to call openly gay/lesbian pastors who are in committed relationships.  He further became angry when a congregation in the local area asked him to leave.

This guy can be like sand-paper at times.  He is rough.  He is abrupt.  He will not hesitate to tell you how he feels or how he thinks you should act.  His abrasiveness can be very, very uncomfortable, but none-the-less, I admire and respect the guy.  With him, you've got to take the good and the bad.

Yes, there is some bad.  He's a stubborn, hard headed German just like myself.  When he believes he's right, he will press forward until he can press no further.  Sometimes this trait serves him well.   Sometimes it does not.

For the most part, in my relationship with him, it served him well.

As I came to know him, I got the chance to see more and more of his heart.  His compassion.  His desire to leave the world a better place than he had found it.

Tick people off?  Sure.

But procure land for the local food pantry.  He did that too.

Become domineering when disagreed with?  Yep.

But spearhead an effort to build a community member a home so that she and her family, including a severely disabled son could make ends meet.  He did that too.

Take on a denomination he felt was completely and totally wrong with no compromise?  Yes.

But actively put a ton of time and energy and drive to raise money to purchase motorcycles for pastors in Africa so that they could minister in their congregations?  He did that too.

Have a disagreement with me in which he felt I was wrong and off base when it came to seeking changes to the church's constitution?  Yep.

Respecting me enough to avoid conflict within the church.  He did that too.

But now the local church family relationship will no longer exist.  He is moving on to a place that he hopefully can worship without anger or frustration.  He is moving on taking both the good and the bad. 

I wish it could be different, but it is probably for the best--both for him and for the church.

But that's not going to stop me from being a little sadder today.