Last night, I went to choir practice.
We had to have the obligatory litany. You know, the one that starts off by someone saying, "How is everyone?"
I changed the litany last night by saying, "Disappointed."
Everyone kind of looked at me funny.
I continued, "I'm disappointed that my daughter isn't as good as I am yet."
That elicited a few interesting looks, so I knew I'd better get the story out.
"You see, because the kids had piano lessons today, they (and we) all ate at different times. My middle child wanted to go play really badly, but she also knew she needed to finish everything on her plate. Because I wasn't sitting at the table with her, she hatched a plan. Went into the kitchen to get a drink, but she took her plate with her. She took it outside and dumped it."
Snickers came from those gathered.
"Ah, but she made a mistake. A little later, one of her friends needed a bicycle tire aired up, and she asked me to help. I walked out the door, and I saw ketchup, peas, and chicken laying on the ground. 'Kaylee!' I yelled. 'Come here.'"
She rode her bike up to me.
"How did this chicken, ketchup, and peas get here?"
Kaylee then got the "look." It's the look every parent knows. The look of being caught red handed.
"Poor kid hasn't quite figured it out yet," I finished. "She should have given her plate to the dog, and I would have never known."
"Did you tell her that?" one of the congregation members asked.
"Hell no!" I responded. "She will hopefully figure that out one day, but for now, I'm disappointed."